I'm still short of cash, but figured I could help maintain and grow the site through my selfless contribution of a free poast. To better understand what makes a Jester tick, I thought I'd ask him; I just saw him on my leg a minute ago...
I might repeat some I've said before; I do suffer from short term memory loss. I can open a drawer or cupboard and stand there and wonder why. I also have long-term memory loss; I don't even remember being born. I'm doing pretty well with medium-term memory: I can get my keys and walk to my car in a minute or so and remember I wanted to drive, somewhere.
Here's what he could offer as personal foibles, grievances and irritations:
* I already noted I despise the faux-French Nasonex bumble bee. Another gross stupidity are commercials showing take out buckets of food; typically chicken, and typically Col. Sanders, that are filled over the top edge with chicken piled high. Meaning you couldn't put a lid on the thing unless you sat on it to press it down first. I'm all for suggesting you get a lot, and more than you deserve, but that's just stupid. Starbucks should show a cup of coffee filled over the brim.
* Despite being somewhat repulsed by Activia commercials, I'm really mystified by the quart size I saw at the grocery the other day.
* I saw a photo of Elton John, and he's gotten really large.. apparently it's baby fat.
* I saw a photo of Sinead O'Connor, who's also quite big and has a black mullett. That is so many shades of wrong...
* I think Ida Jenshun is really cute and talented enough, and a good example of how this site exposes us to things we might not come across otherwise. But I'm still not getting the accent, and how it's replaced by a twang when she sings.
* I feel every star-making show has failed to deliver, and in its mission. The latest is America's Got Talent filled with these ensemble group finalists of dancer/gymnast/acrobats. No single simple talented person, and really who is gonna watch one of these except for Cirque de Soleil? I watched "The Voice", but criminy that was just a promotion of the judges as each took the stage more than the contestants and the whole thing always included somebody in a "duet." Since most duets are somebody singing with someone who's died, that really isn't something to concentrate on.
* Most are known for blowing it on their "winners" - based on the losers. Jackie Evancho lost. Idol is filled with lucky losers; and tell me anyone is ever going to remember or hear back from that country guy who won this year. (or the guy from last year. Or the one from the year before that). I did see a cut of Susan Boyle, doing more of a "dramatic reading" than actually singing. That was pretty scary as it seems she's lost it, if she ever had it.
* is "Samba Pa Ti" to be taken literally? Pa-Ti down.
* It is inconsequential, unless somebody useful gets needlessly injured. And way too many and too long. But I would rather watch meaningless football than basketball or baseball that "counts."
* The whole "global warming" thing is bogus, and made-up fiction by scientists and people on the take with investments in green technology and new energy. Proven by the ice caps not melting that dang much and todays Sept. temps of upper 90's in Michiana and the lack of sudden severe weather systems that we don't experience, like we're having some sudden rush of tornados or hurricanes or earthquakes.
* Those might be more on the theory Pat proposed, as far as the "God's Out To Get You" if not Mother Nature. If so, I'm trying to figure where I can hide.
* Tomorrow's Fighting Irish opener here will be in the 90's. I wonder what temp gold melts at.
* I love those "sell your gold and silver!" commercials. First off, every one of those places are among the most unwelcome, unfriendly, distasteful establishments around; the security gates, counter thugs, baleful glares, shoulder shrugs... If I could learn alchemy and turn silver plate into silver maybe I'd be more inclined to visit.
* You know, with football players selling rings and personal items and jerseys and stuff, I sure hope the Irish don't have someone trying to cash in their helmet... Or scavengers trying to lift the dome.
* I'd invite Pat over again for a margarita, but I'm gonna swear off those for awhile... I tried them again but I really think Tequila is a hallucinogen. Or one of those knock-out drugs guys slip into a girl's drink at a bar. except I guess I'd be the guy slipping it into his own drink, which is pretty stupid right there.
* I didn't expect Vermont to flood; I thought it was mountainous. I guess there are valleys, too.
* I was going to do a rant on "how I hate my job" but figured 1. nobody cares, which I've found to be the case at work I wonder if you can get a Rodney Dangerfield tee shirt, though.
* Any job, even a bad one, is better than none. I'm good.
* I did see Lady Gagag impersonating a guy, with the black wig. Although an improvement, it's not enough. And Annie Lennox already did that better years ago at the Grammys. Heck, everyone has done everything better than gagag has done.
* man, I hate to end on a bad note... and Lady Gagag is one bad note. Oh; here's good news: The Bears and Colts both won their final preseason games. I guess that's up there in importance with : "U.S. signs Peace Accord with Canada." or "Unemployment figures drop with new hiring in drug trade nationwide." "Wall Street Calms Down and Stocks Recover as President and Congress Finally Go Away, for Awhile." The people who decide stock prices remind me of that character Martin Short played on SNL, with the twitchy guy with the cigarette paranoid about everything... Or somebody who actually downed the big tub of Activia.
Ace; wait for it... wait for it...